Just today, I thought that my life ends the way others have way ahead of me and now confronting the unknown, however I knew I will never be alone. My journey would have stopped the moment I took my life after lunchtime due to depressing circumstances brought about by so many callous and heartless people who were out there. The journey ahead may be arduous and certainly, we face the unknown but just the same, we go that way but never too soon and by our own. The moment I was at the end of the rope, clinging for hope and stability, friends came to my rescue. They called and few came to my house where I live alone. It made me felt that their love followed me and stayed with me – it somehow eased out the pains.
I just felt the coldness of the gun up my temple and was crying endlessly, my mind clouded already and with little faith I mustered, I posted something on my Facebook and when friends started filling out the blanks for me, it somehow subdued me. Replaced it and just stares at it. The nearest I could get to death was never on a death note because I never prepared one, at least, for some, I was supposed to end it like the way I think I should but guardian angels come to my rescue. Facing the unknown will always be scary, especially when you knew that you will leave friends and families behind. Especially so also when your departure will be as swift as they told me when they decided to close the door on me and ask me to leave. It burdened me yes, but I mustered the courage to move on, feel life and value it.
God will always be my final refuge. Always had been and always be. I may be battered now, emotionally and irrationally but I am whole. I am renewed by the faith of my friends and family. I am reassured that living has more to it than the peace of the unknown. I may have gone through this life and yes, I will never be alone but does it justify my action? I believed it does not. The opportunity that you are still reading my thought now states that I am alive and well. I may be battered as I said, bruised but getting by. There are more to living than in dying and surely too, as I journey on, paddling on through life’s tempest seas, I shall reach the shore upon the lighthouse where my light comes from.