Journey 232: The Meaning of Motherhood

It is very impossible for a man to define the meaning of motherhood more so that I have yet to have my own children with my wife but an attempt at finding meaning to it based on what I had in experienced as a son and a husband will at least, give credit to all mothers as we celebrate, everyday, the important role they play in our lives. Women as they say are the lamp that lights up a home and a man is the pillar of every lighted home, simply because no man can be an effective pillar if he himself is grappling in the darkest house, not a home, but a house empty, an empty chair or worse, an empty heart.

My mother, as has with your mother too, is one supporter, believer, biggest fan, trustworthy bestfriend, confidant, understanding lady and a conscientious parent. I grew up in a family that has me more closer to my Mum each day and even until her last breath, I was convinced that I am her son and she is more, so not only all that I wished for in a person because she is importantly my mother, who remains compassionate, considerate and affably charming. Our mothers are the kind of image of a person full of strength, vitality, determination and courage. All throughout her married life, she has to balance her own life, her social networks, her family, both as a mother and a wife. No superwoman deserves more than any accolade than our mothers.

Whenever we are at school, it is our mothers who comes up to the affairs and pin our ribbons. She is always present in every meeting, looking at our grades before our fathers do, scold us first before our fathers do and forgive us first than anyone does and more so, understands us well in our limitations and shortcomings.

The meaning of motherhood is one that since giving birth, nurturing and caring for us when we grew up and understanding us when we independently seek our own paths – remains to be the most graceful lady in our lives. She may have her own flaws but we understand because it is what she is made of and her flaws are what define us too. Her flaws help us understand her the most and also to align ourselves to the goodness of her heart and the sincerity of her intentions. It is her own shortcomings, much more than ours, that we understand her role more than just passing hurtful judgements and an uncaring ability to ignore her. If a woman indeed enters into motherhood, then she has already accepted her fate that she has given up much of herself for her children. Motherhood is an art of giving up ones pleasures and convenience for the sake the children. Her priorities changed as children come into her life and as lived well, her own children’s priorities are her own now.

However one defines it, many still in our society are too irrational regarding our mothers. We wrongly see their intentions and their scolding are considered an encroachment of our lives but let us see it this way: Had it not for her, will we be here? Had it not because of her ability to wake up early in the morning to prepare our food, wash our laundries, iron our clothes, buy us anything, will we be of equal success now? Had it not for her in our lives, can we find the right wife or husband, boyfriend, girlfriend or partner? Our mothers are the ones who feed us when we are incapable of eating, even lactating for us to eat while when we are adults and had lived a busy lifestyle, great careers with properties and monies in the bank, we tend to let someone fed her when she is incapable of eating.
Sadly too, we only got to commercially celebrate Mother’s day because it is May 8 but are we not supposed to celebrate our life with our mothers now that we are more successful, more blessed? If one needs to define the meaning of motherhood, then embrace your mother, hold on to her memories and hold her hand, walk her through life as she has perfectly did her part in walking you through life unselfishly.

Even now that we have everything in life, can it be possible to just remain the child we were to our mothers? When her memory fails her and she keeps repeating her words, sometimes even forgetful of your name, can we still be the child in us who fondly calls her Mama? Can we perhaps even forget ourselves instead remember our Momie? Can we? Because if we can’t then perhaps reminding ourselves of the lullaby our mother sang to us to sleep can help you reclaim what has been lost in us – our own childhood.

Categories: Journeys | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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4 thoughts on “Journey 232: The Meaning of Motherhood

  1. AJ

    You got me there, Dr Wends! I didn’t expect to see a photo of my mom and me here. Haha!

    Couldn’t agree with you more. You nailed the meaning of motherhood. And if I may add, we can reciprocate her sacrifice and nurturing when she’s frail and senile. That’s when we can become a “mother” to our mothers.

    I saw that in mum. Her own mother had Alzheimer’s and she never abandoned her even when my grandma had forgotten who my mum was. She stayed with us and mum took care of her until her death at age 87. She already had grown children, but without complaint she went back to diaper duties and feeding, as if she had a baby again. My mother became her mother’s mother.

    There really comes a time when the tables are turned. And I know what to do then. I learned from the best – my mum!

    Thanks for this sweet post, Doc. I’m tickled pink to be a part of it. 🙂

    • Thank you too AJ for such a wonderful life you shared with your Mum and is extended to me and the rest of the blogging community who reads you. I am touched by your blog too and the way you write is one that seemed to be me talking to you personally. I am as I had said, a believer of faith in our parents, much more with our Mothers. They are the light that guides us through in this life and the posts, those solid pillars that will allow us to cling on to when we are in trouble.

      Thank you once again and I hope one of these days, Il be able to meet you personally as well as your lovely Mum.

      God bless you and your Mum in your journey!

  2. Thank you so much Doc for uploading the picture of my mom and me. This is a wonderful post. My favourite part:
    “Our mothers are the kind of image of a person full of strength, vitality, determination and courage. All throughout her married life, she has to balance her own life, her social networks, her family, both as a mother and a wife. No superwoman deserves more than any accolade than our mothers.”
    Sunny hello from Berlin!

    • You are most welcome Krizz. It is one blog I am happy sharing with you and your lovely Mum. Well, as we journey on in our lives, we have superwoman in our lives, and these are our mothers who remained faithfully appreciative of what we do and most proud of what we had become.

      God bless you there in Berlin.

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